| By FARAH HARITH
(farah.harith@malaysiandigest.com) |
Friday, 21 December 2012 14:44
|
FOR what seems like already an eternity, the world has been abuzz with talk of the ancient Mayan prophecy that the world is set to end on Dec 21, 2012.
Doomsday preppers across the world have been fortifying their bunkers, stockpiling food and generally going a bit cuckoo over it. Top 10 lists on ‘what to do before doomsday’ are also in abundance all across the internet.
At Malaysian Digest, we prefer to see it as a ‘cup being half-full’ situation, instead of the other way around. After all, if doom is imminent, why sweat the small stuff? Let’s take a look at the burdens that WILL be taken off your weary shoulders should the Mayans have the last laugh.
10. Debts? What Debts?
Filepic: Flanagan
Have another 20 years to pay for that nice condo in Bandar Seri Damansara? Recently refinanced your car? How about that pesky PTPTN loan which never seems to end? Well, this is one reason why doomsday can come as a relief. All monetary debts wiped clean, whatever loans you’ve amassed in your adult life will go bye-bye birdie. No more worrying about your salary depleting every month due to settling your bills, your money’s all yours now. Oh wait, that means no more salaries too…oh well, moving along.
9. Getting The Latest Smart Phone Won’t Matter Anymore
Filepic: Gudjonsson
Admit it. You can’t bear the thought of holding your oh-so-outdated iPhone 5 in your hand, not when your smarmy colleague is parading his iPhone 5s in front of everyone, courtesy of a shopping trip in the US. With doomsday here, there’s no more fretting about keeping up with the latest gadgets, about which fruit you’re opting for, Apples or Berries. No standing in long lines waiting to lay your hands on the newest Samsung, which will be dated in three months. Go on, heave a sigh of relief, you’ve earned it. Of course, this also means you can stop worrying about what to tweet about next..
8. Supplementary Relief
Filepic: www.bztoons.com
Here's one husbands nationwide will rejoice over. The end of days means you won't have to deal with your wife's credit card bills anymore. You will no longer face the month-end stress of opening your mail and facing the reality of her latest shoe, clothes, make-up hunting expedition at the mall. All husbands who have had the misfortune of issuing their wives with the much dreaded 'supplementary card' will definitely find this a much welcome situation.
7. Goodbye, Relationship Woes
Filepic: nwso.net
Ever find it hard to resist your 'happy' friends' efforts to make everyone around them 'happy' as well? Just because they appear to have found bliss in married life, they find the insane urge to drag everyone around them into it as well, hence the birth of that awful man-made creation: the blind-date. So for the single ones, you now finally have a solid reason to avoid any more blind date set-ups from your happily married friends.
6. No More KL Traffic
Filepic: funny-games.biz
In KL, traffic jams are about as common as a politician holding a press conference, and almost as annoying. Anyone who lives in the Klang Valley will understand the mental and physical stress one faces during the long commute to the office; which is, the very act of commuting itself. That modern act of self-inflicted torture ie sitting behind the wheel in gridlock while chewing your fingernails as the clock winds down to that extremely important appointment, will soon be non-existent. Tailgaters, double parkers, Mat Rempit, boy racers; all these phenomenon will soon be nothing but a distant memory.
5. Go On, Yell At Your Boss
Filepic: Guggiedaly's Blog
Anyone who has ever worked or is currently in an employer-employee situation as a lowly bottom-feeder has, at one point or other, felt the rising urge to yell at their superiors. If the Mayan prophecy holds up its end of the bargain, you can finally march into your boss’s office, say 'Go to hell' and not worry about the repercussions. Of course, we hold no responsibility if the prophecy turns out to be false and you’ll have to sheepishly ask for your job back the next day.
4. Who Will I Vote For in The Election? Who Cares?
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Over the last couple of years, the whole of Malaysia has been speculating on when the 13th General Election will take place. With the mandated time reaching an end in just a few months, the speculations is reaching fever pitch levels. So here’s one thing we can stop agonizing over. No more election dates. Most importantly, no more trying to figure out who on earth to vote for.
3. No More AES? A-Okay
Filepic: Sodahead
We can finally stop bickering about AES! Whether it’s good, it’s bad, it enriches the few, it’s unfair…well, it’s gone. This also works for all those unpaid council summons that you’ve secretly stashed in your glove compartment; they’ll soon be history.
2. Reality Bites
Filepic: roflrazzi.com
The number two reason pretty much speaks for itself. No more reality means no more reality TV shows. Annoyed at why the Kardashians command attention on TV? Or why people even enter The Bachelor / Bachlorette? Well, we can finally be done with surgically-enhanced celebrities trying to convince us, through the TV screen, that the fight they're having with their spouses is real and not scripted. Turning on the television will be less cringe-worthy. But then again, there won’t be any more TV either.
1. But You Know, Just In Case..
And the number one reason, the king of them all, the Godfather of all top 10 countdown list reasons, the big kahuna of why you shouldn't be worried about the Mayan doomsday prophecy is: You don't want to look stupid when December 22nd comes along.
In the event the Mayans were wrong, check in with Malaysian Digest at 7.12pm for a special treat.
--mD
